$$$ At Least He Has Lots of Money $$$

I might have lost some hair with the high levels of anxiety from this experience. I'm writing this post at 2:30 AM, but I probably wont post this until next week.....

My roommate is out of town and I had been asleep for a couple of hours. (Its Saturday night) Given that my bedroom is in the living room, I tend to hear things going on outside of my door. [Usually this consists of dramatic, male cat-fights.] I was wakened by my the rattling of my front door handle. Then I heard someone trying to unlock the door, over and over again. I layed there, frozen, wanting to cry. I knew there was no way that it was my roommate. I started to wonder if it was somebody playing a joke on me, but who would do that at 2 in the morning?

This went on for ten minutes. I finally got the courage to walk to the door and look out the peep-hole. There was a guy out there with a black, "chimney boy"/bandera hat, a extremely tight shirt, and a black-hemp, choker necklace (I promise). I watched him bang his head on the door and then lay on the floor. He then started to call some number on his phone over and over again. I could hear him sigh and then I realized he was looking under the door at my little piglets (aka: toes).

He started to put his fingers under the door and I finally said, "Dude, you have the wrong apartment! This is mine."

I startled him. Confused, he shuffled back to the other side of the hall and defensively said, "Uh huh, this is MINE."

I yelled through the door, "Since when? I've been living here and you are confused. What apartment number are you trying to reach?"

He said, "305. This is MY apartment"

At this point I felt like I was dealing with a drunk 2-year old. I loudly and firmly retorted, "I have the key, I have been sleeping here in MY apartment, and I don't know what to tell you."

We argued for several minutes. I decided to try the silent treatment. After about a minute of silence he slurred, "Oh my....... you are right! This apartment is wrong. Mine is on the TOP floor." There was a long and awkward pause before he said, "Well I don't know what to say. I have a really beautiful boyfriend and lots of money--- So, I'm sorry"

I'll let you ponder on that response.

As he turned to leave, he ran into the wall and then continued on his way. I laughed after the comment--Did not make sense whatsoever.... At least he has lots of money. In other words, there's no way he would try to break into my female and "poor" apartment.